Talk about a highway to hell: In a misfounded move to save the physical CD, Wal-Mart has signed an exclusive deal to sell AC/DC’s upcoming new album.

The goal here is admirable enough. I’m a huge proponent of actual CDs versus strictly digital collections — call me old school, but that’s how I roll — and I’d hate to see the tangible disc do a disappearing act. Still, Wal-Mart and AC/DC just don’t strike me as the most promising equation to revive a fast-fading technology.

Just imagine the ads:

“Hey families, here’s an offer you can’t refuse! Come into a glaringly bright and screaming-kid-filled store to buy a CD full of glaringly bad and screaming-singer-filled songs! ACT NOW!” (Insert shot of that creepy guitar player in the schoolboy outfit doing that weird little leg hop dance here)

Digital music may be the wave of the future, but I had hoped CDs would stick around at least through my lifetime. There’s something nice about having the music in your hands, flipping through the cover book of a brand new disc, and deliberately putting it into your player before being treated to the tunes. That whole process, though, is somewhat tainted by an afternoon at Wal-Mart followed by an aurally appalling hour of music that makes Miley Cyrus sound like Mozart.

My apologies to any hardcore AC/DC fans. Partially for my harsh comments, and partially just for the fact that you’re an AC/DC fan. Ah, I jest; I’m happy for anyone who enjoys the stylings of Brian Johnson and the gang from down under. In fact, as a gesture of good will, I’ll even leave you with an exclusive tidbit of our own finding about the upcoming album. Yes, dear friends, TechCult has uncovered a real scoop during our research this week. Ready for the news?

It appears that the new AC/DC CD — titled “Black Ice” — is expected to sound exactly like every one of the last 16 albums the band has put out.

Sorry…couldn’t resist.

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