Midwestern Businessman Makes New Yahoo Offer

Yahoo may finally have its answer: A family-run convenience store and souvenir shop in Mountain Grove, Missouri has offered to buy the company.

“Jim’s Snacks and Such,” located off County Road 2 and Main Street, announced its offer after learning of Carl Icahn’s settlement with Yahoo Monday morning.

“Now that he ain’t gonna get them Microsoft boys to buy it up, we figured we might have something to offer ’em,” store owner Jim Crickton said.

Crickton and his wife, Mary Sue, have operated “Jim’s Snacks and Such” for 18 years. That experience, Crickton believes, gives them the business know-how needed to turn a company such as Yahoo around.

“We sell dried beef, chips, and lots of different kinds of snack foods,” Crickton explained. “Peanuts, cheese crackers, you name it. We’ve got postcards, too — and maps,” he added.

When confronted with the likely cost of acquiring a company as large as Yahoo, Crickton chuckled.

“Well, I’ll be,” he said. “I may not have that kind of cash layin’ around, but I’ll tell you what: What I lack in monies, I make up for in smarts.”

When asked whether he understood what Yahoo actually did, Crickton spat and walked away.

Yahoo representatives were not immediately available for comment.